So Now Your Three
Saturday, June 27, 2015 at 09:27AM 
Dear Jaxson, you turn 3 years old today...for such a young boy you have a long and loving history. I remember when we were waiting for you to arrive (not knowing it was you) I wanted your Mom to have a girl. I think all Mom's dream of a daughter and all Mom's want their daughter to have a daughter, but you know, Mom's aren't always so smart. Even though you might think we are. I went so far as to wear OPI pink nail polish called "It's a Girl." Silly Nana, right. But you had a surprise for me..and right from the start, you showed me boys are the best...you even showed up way early so you could get started with this journey of yours and you have proven over and over again in your three years...that life really is meant to be lived in joy and laughter...with a few tears every now and again when things don't go exactly your way.
I love this photo of you and I. It's our beginning...our real beginning. It is the first time that I held you. It was a special day. You were so tiny when you were born..barely the size of the palm of my hand but what I didn't know, and I wished I did, was that inside that tiny body was a big strong, happy boy...just busting at the seams to break lose of your nest and get started on your magical journey...and you wanted to take all of us who love you along for the ride...you see, now I know you had such a zest for life that you wanted to get the party started...from such a tiny spark...your world has become our bright light.
You worked so hard to come home...oh, it took you awhile for sure. You did your job and we did ours by standing guard over that little tent of yours...camping out with you in the hospital and whispering words of love and dreams into your tiny ears...we fought with you for each ounce that you gained and cheered with great enthusiasm when you reached 3 pounds...that is when my heart settle down to a regular beat again..it is when I knew, in my heart that you were going to become our bright shinning star. I just didn't know back then how bright you were going to shine...I love this photo of you also...when you came for the first time to the Maine house and snuggled in my bed with your Mom and your big brother Liam..what a happy day that was.
Before long you were healthy and growing, at your own pace, but what you learned how to do first, was smile. That's a true story Jaxson, you smiled early and often...not just a tiny smile but big, big smiles and you giggled...You still do...your got your giggle from your Mom..she does that to. You both laugh from the tips of your toes all the way to your head...Mom gave that laugh to both you and Liam and I love that...when you are all in a fit of laughter it makes my heart sing...happy tunes. With each milestone that you were making, you were never far from your brother's side. He helped you grown and learn. He loved you from the moment you came home and he could finally touch you. I get such a tingling feeling in my heart...almost like it could burst, sort of like fireworks, when I see the two of you playing when you don't know that I am watching. I even like it when you have your arguments...because you say "sorry" to each other in a tone that melts me. I know we make you say it...but I think you really do mean it...You and Liam will always be best friends, watching out for each other...walking life together.
I'm putting this Christmas photo of you and Liam in your letter today Jaxson because it is my favorite of both of you from last Christmas...I want to remember always both of your sweet smiles and what it means to feel the magic of Christmas. I want you to know how you two have put the meaning of that day right in front of me...in the gift of both of you.
So Jaxson...from a tiny spark to a great big flame...in only three years, I want to share with you some moments that make me know that God was much smarter than this person that you call Nana...oh, he knows girls are pretty and sweet...but also whiney...He knows that pink is a happy color...and shoes with bows and sparkles are fun to wear but he also knew, that for this family, we needed a Jaxson. We needed a boy who loves all colors and loves life with such energy, and that energy gets passed to us...so much, that we all go to bed very early each day when we have been together. God knew that you were perfect for us in every way...but mostly I think he knew that you and your brother would always light a fire under us...to help us understand that as we all grow, we still need to play and laugh and maybe even jump in a few puddles. We need to see blue eyes that sparkle in the sunlight, and feet that run so fast...you can catch a star. We needed to see dirty and sticky and know that in that little face a treat so delicious was enjoyed. I especially, needed to know how wonderful your hugs can feel and how freely you give them...and I needed you to teach me about singing My Little Boy with The Eyes of Blue, at nap time, in the big bed. I made that song up just for you. You have taught me so many lessons in your three years...oh My Sweet Baby Boy, I can't wait to see what adventures you are going to take me on this year...Let's get the party Started...You are my Sunshine everyday.
Perhaps we'll jump in a few more puddles...
Or maybe you'll continue to squirt me and laugh that sinister laugh, even when I beg for mercy for you to stop....you do love to tease me...
I love our Wednesday trips to the YMCA for your swimming lessons...you are so brave and you try everything...even diving off the big diving board. Papa and I are so proud of you because we know how scared you were when you first started...but your "spark" keeps you moving forward...
Sometimes super hero's need to slow down and rest...you and Liam already know why we go to the Maine house...it's the perfect place for just slowing down...even if you only do it for 15 minutes and then your off and running again with re-newed energy...
So Jaxson...this is how I see you...in living color. You brighten any day, you smile often, you live life your on your own terms and no one can change your mind. You sing, you dance like crazy. That just about kills me and we have the very best conversations, I wish I could freeze your little boy voice rigth where it is...You color my world and you have, right from the very beginning...when you made your entrance at your own time...and I might add, with your own agenda and in that very tiny beating heart of yours, you already had a plan. You came here because you knew we needed you, especially you, and you are giving..."TREATS TO EVERYONE'...and I like nothing better than a good treat...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BUDDY....Nana Loves You So Much...
A side note...sometimes people wonder about the Blogging Life...I do upon occasion also. Then I have a day like today...when I want to really save and honor the special moments in my life. Life isn't always easy, we all struggle but we also have so much goodness and reasons to be happy. So much joy if we continue to see what we have been given. I write because I want my kids and my Grandkids to know how important they are to both me and the world. It adds a purpose to my life and someday I hope it enriches their lives.
Writing is not only for my family...it's a part of who I am. It's what I love to do. Writing about whatever moves me at any given time. I don't try to make it more than what it is. I don't strive for subjects to write about or write from prompts...I write from a personal perspective. What I feel, what I love. If I don't feel it, it doesn't happen..
If you visit my page...I hope you leave feeling that your time here has enriched you somehow, maybe put a smile on your face and sometimes maybe even shed a few tears...it's all good. Life is happening...don't let it slip by...take a lesson from Jaxson..go out and live it...with Zest and a bit of Color.
Reader Comments (17)
A beautiful and heartfelt post, Cheryl, easy to see what a gift he is. Seems Jaxson has so much to teach us all! Boys rule!
What a beautiful blog, Nana. I always love reading what you write and how you think. It's so fun getting to know you all.
Reading and scrolling through your heartwarming photos and words has been the highlight of my day. The rain pitter pattering outside mimics the tears on my cheeks . . . realizing that my deepest joy comes from being with my granddaughters. You are so blessed you have the foundation and consistency of your visits and relationships with Liam and Jaxson. I keep replaying the little video of my 4-year-old Cora belting out the words to "Let It Go" while we were sitting in the back of the van her dad was driving in April during one of our rare, but special visits to Michigan. Then I think of her falling off the slide the other day and breaking her right arm, and my frustration at not being able to be with her, too far away . . . but fortunately, *facetime* is the current next best thing to being there. So, once again, I live so much through you and all you so generously share with us. Thank you, Dearest Cheryl, for being YOU . . . so compassionate, caring and genuine. xox
Thank you Susan...he is easy and fun...and it's been wonderful to watch him grow after such a shakey start...thanks for visiting with him...and me.
Thank you Peg...it is always so heartwarming to see you here...at the top of the list. Your continued support means a lot to me...next time you come, I hope you will be able to meet Jaxson...
Oh Antoinette I am so sorry to hear of Cora's accident...kids are so resilent though and hopefully she will get it healed so she still gets to enjoy the summer...I know how fortunate I am to live close by and to also have a daughter who shares the boys so willing...I don't take it for granted. I also know this "little" stage moves quickly so I do take advantage of every opportunity to be with them...I am so happy for all Grandparents who now can Skype and do Facetime..what a gift that is...and I know how much you love your little girls...thanks for popping by and visiting...I love reading your comments and know that we share so much...xoxo
Such a delightful post Chery, and what a pleasure to meet these cuties in your photos.
You know I adore ALL of your photography, Cheryl, but I have to say that the photos of Jaxon and Liam are among your very best. Really. You just capture the best poses, best expressions, best spirit. I feel like I know these two and treasure them too, because of how you portray them, with such love. Jaxon is such a spunky, happy little sprite. He makes me laugh and smile all the time, with his glasses and crocs and looks -- I can only imagine what your life is like with him on a regular basis. And yes, I always, always feel enriched by visiting your blog. Thank you.
Cheryl what an amazing tribute to such an incredible journey and little boy!
Those boys sure are blessed to have you in their lives, the jumping puddles is my favorite, brings me back to being a kid myself. Wish I had a grandma so involved like you. I never really knew mine...your light shines through these boys. Life flies by, enjoy each moment...never let the darkness of others dim it ever! You're a shining star! xo
Thank you Barbara for your visit...these boys are such a joy to photograph and enjoy...any Grandmother would feel the same, I'm sure...
Sherry thank you so much for that lovely comment...coming from you I will take that personally, knowing that you are such a wonderful photographer yourelf and grateful that you find the goodness in others...I always take your comments to heart...you have discribed Jaxson perfectly...he is a little sprite with lots of spunk...and spending time with both him and Liam is one of my greatest joys...I know how fast they grow so I take advantage of every minute with them...and yes, I take lots of photo's of them...Liam is over it all now, so he doesn't co-operate as well as Jaxson anymore...LOL
I look forward to many more visits with you....here and on your blog also...xoxo
H.S. you always surprise me when I least expect to see you...I love how you pop in and out of my world...my favortie girl. I take all you have to say to heart...your wise for your age...although your catching up on me in life experiences...but the one life experience you will remember long after me, is that I am right about these grandkids....they will rock your world and you them...I know it for sure. Yours will even be able to ride horses by the time they are 3...
Thank you for your words...no matter the distance...you really do feel like my H.S....xxoo
Such a wonderful letter to your dear, handsome little boy I had tears Cheryl you are a wonderful writer...
Cheryl, As the mother of two boys, both grown now, your post made my heart sing with sweet memories. The love you feel for your family is evident in every way - both pictures and stories and insights. Yes, I wish you could hold on to these moments forever. And as I parent my 18 year-old about to head off to college, this post is especially encouraging. Teenagers tend to be self-involved and suddenly he doesn't need me any more. It's part of the separation process, and it hurts a bit. But, I know this will bring him full circle right back to me - the son with the smile that melts my heart. Your tribute to your grandson is a wonderful reminder of the many blessings of this life - and I thank you for sharing. Posts like this one make the blogging life so worthwhile!
Cheryl, this pretty much leaves me speechless, in a grand way. Your deep love for Jaxson clearly shines in each word you've written, and I know it goes beyond loving Jaxson, you love life, you love all those in your life. Me, I'm truly blessed beyond measure to have you as a friend, though we are distanced by miles, we connect, and I love connecting with you here, reading about you and your family. It is P r i c e l e s s! I hope Jaxson had a wonderful birthday, cause you certainly brightened this world with this post, and I'm sure you brightened Jaxson's day on his birthday. Awesome, and fabulous! xx
Oh Beverly, you are just so kind and I love having you in my life...yes, even with the distance...You lift me up, inpires me and we share our worlds openly and honestly...that's what makes a good friend...not how close your houses are...Jaxson is a gift, as is Liam...but this guy just shines in personality and survival...perhaps his beginning mekes me hold on a bit tighter to him and also, he is probably the last we will have...so I do enjoy all his littl antic's...Thank you for your loving words...and for sharing both the boys with me...xoxoxo