Week two of our new year...I am hanging by a thread trying to get everything put away, cleared out, organized and making my list for moving forward. January always feels like the first day of school did when I was a kid...exciting to have a new start..with new pencils and paper. Notebooks with wonderful covers that were gifts this year. My writing awaits me but I cannot begin until all is in order.
I want this year to have more meaning, more intensity of purpose. I want to follow my dreams and reach for the stars. There is no excuse not to be able to do this...it really is all about choices and a little word called..NO. It is a small word but it has a lot of power if we can remember to use it when the need arises. I'm learning and I'm getting so much better at it.
January is also my birthday month. This year I was forced to take a better look at what that means. I really wanted to be aware of time passing, more quickly each year. To calculate what I expect to do with the rest of my life..and so I've made some promises to myself. I am, of course my own worst enemy. So, once again I will break some bad habits...learn to be more disciplined in my writing and photography and most importantly, get back to the life I love. Where I call the shots for where my time is spent and not being pulled in so many directions...
Each year...I pick a word for the year. I thought this year that I would skip that process, until I stumbled on my word...it fits me and my frame of mind perfectly. This year my word is Nourish...I love the way that word falls off my tongue. I love the visions that dance in my head when I see it. It was exactly the word I needed but didn't know it..but now I own it.
I will nourish my dreams..I will write. I will photograph, I will hang with my Grandsons as often as possible. My kids are funny and entertaining and full of knowledge. I want to spend as much time in their space as possible and I relish the written word of others so I want to read more books. I'm making a separate notebook to keep track of what I read and what the book was about and even where I heard about it...and of course I want to walk with Jim to so many more destinations. He wants to get a Teardrop (google it)...I don't. I know though, that we will meet somewhere in the middle.
So where does this all leave me...I'm giving up holding on by a tread. I did that last year. This year it's all about letting go...waking up each day with the freedom to choose my path for that day. To stay in the moment, be focused and disciplined. To know that mornings are for brain work and late afternoon or evenings can be for trolling the internet. I can no long let other people control my time. Either in person or on the net. I have so many friends in so many places...that is a joy. I will not be far away from them...but I won't be jumping each time I hear a ping or a ring..this, my friends won't be easy.
So that is my plan...as the year unfolds in all it's delights and mysteries..we'll see how I do if I let go of that thread...I might dangle for awhile, as I learn my way, but hopefully you will all see the results of my resolve to to nourish myself...one foot in front of the other. One day at at day...moving forward in grace...
This Guest House (Rumi)
Linking up with Texture Tuesday...photo textured with Kim Klassen's Chill